What about you?
Is blaming a habit !!!
Some people blame others as a habit. Others do it occasionally. What about you?
guilt tripper is not a special person he/she is within us!. Just the ratio may vary…
It’s easier to blame someone else than to accept responsibility. It takes less energy to blame others than to improve our own behaviors. That’s why our society defaults to pointing fingers. We love the easy way out.
Things won’t always go the way you want. That’s one of life’s most significant realizations and dealing with a negative person is never pleasant, but blamers can be the worst type.
Anyone can give simple solutions that leave them from your life as quickly as possible. and never look back. That is the advice most self-help books will give you. But for many of us, that just isn’t possible. Maybe that person is your parent or sibling, cousin maybe that person is your roommate and you can’t move, or — even worse — maybe that person is your boss, maybe in-laws …
“Sometimes, It’s arduous to find whether a person is our well-wisher or a blamer”
a blame-based person does not easily change his ways. Seeking someone to blame was in their blood. It was their way of trying to keep the control, trying to make things right.
How to catch?
Blamers are the most difficult type of negative person to deal with, and dealing with them often leaves you stressed, depressed, and feeling guilty for things that are not your fault.
“ It’s hard to catch “
Even if a blamer knows what they did or said was wrong, they will never admit it. They will keep arguing until you give up so they never have to admit they were wrong.
Common Characteristics
- Never-Ever takes responsibility for their mistakes
if something goes wrong it is always someone else’s fault. So they will not apologize, for anything, because they consider themselves blameless in every situation.
“Blamer will every mistake around on you and make you feel guilty for their mistake”
2. Refuse to accept mistakes
A blamer will argue a point to death. Even if you provide them with proof that they are wrong, they will argue that your proof or your facts are wrong.
“hey will keep arguing until you give up so they never have to admit they were wrong”
3. They won't Compromise
This goes along with the fact that they hate change. Blamers will not change their ways, and they will not compromise. You do it their way, or you don’t do it at all.
4. Exaggerates their problems
They exaggerate their small problems and blame others
5. Extremely selfish
They are extremely selfish and always put their needs first, just like a child, and just like a child, they do not accept responsibility for their actions.
6. Blammer is a good trapper
Do not let yourself fall into the trap into believing they can be nice or a good person.
“ Every ‘nice comment’ they make is really just veiled criticism”
Not every blamer will have all these traits and the blamer in your life may have other characteristics not listed here. But all blamers leave you feeling horrible about yourself after interacting with them.
7. They easily Escalate the fight
They will bring up moments in the past that are not relevant to the current argument
“If you try to defend yourself from their verbal abuse, they will escalate the fight”
A blamer will argue a point to death. Even if you provide them with proof that they are wrong, they will argue that your proof or your facts are wrong. They will even use facts that they have made up to argue their point. You will never win because a blamer is never wrong, some times they are highly emotional.
Identify Friendly Blamers :)
Yes!!! Friendly Blamers- find them?. Someone we care about blames or criticizes us is to examine our own behavior. Is there truth in what they are telling us about ourselves? What was your intention in this situation? If we find that there is validity in what they are telling us, we can take a good look at what they are pointing to, and try to use their words as a lesson and opportunity to grow.
When someone blames, they’re basically trying to shift attention away from themselves. They’re saying ‘don’t look at me, look at that other person.’ And they’re doing it because they don’t want you to pin them down for whatever mistake they made.
How to Solve?
a simple solution to face situations are
Avoid taking the blame to appease the blamer when it’s not your fault. Compromising yourself will weaken your self-respect and leave you susceptible to further emotional assaults.
“Just get to the point and fix it instead of talking so much!
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